Dealing With Those Who Judge You
I have these two conflicting beliefs. On one hand, I’m very thankful for everything I have and have been granted in the past. I know how lucky and blessed I am. Things may not be perfect or where I’d like them to be. For example, I’d love to have a new driveway, a magazine-perfect family room (oh, and entryway, too), and a finished, published book. But ya know, things take time. And what I have at the present moment is pretty damn special.
So about that conflicting belief… Like I said: within the most authentic parts of me, I am beyond happy and satisfy with everything and everyone I have in my present life. But — there’s always a but — I worry that other people might not appreciate the things I do have and judge me for lacking in some departments. This fear of being judge than hinders me from making moves, it makes me feel inadequate, and I begin to feel unappreciative of what I do have. As result, I’m annoyed at the people around me and the world. True story.
I feel silly just writing this crap. What, am I in third grade?
First off, who are these “other people?” I have no idea! And why are they so bored to the point that they are concerned with my life? Seriously, the idea that someone is judging my life is quite narcissistic on my part. If these “other people” are sooo important, they must have better things to do than to critique every aspect of my life, right?
And let’s say these “other people” are real. Let’s say this almighty jury is a collection of my parents, friends, and colleagues. The truth of me knows that I should have compassion with them, because they’re on the same boat that I’m on! They obviously either view the world in a state of lack or they’re worried about what “other people” might think. So, in fact, these other people and I are actually not very different. So why value their opinion over my own?
I’m thinking I have a solution: be the change. Meaning, if I stop judging others for any sort of perceived lack or shortcoming than judgment will no longer be part of my daily life. I won’t think people are judging me since it’s not something I partake in myself. You know what I mean?
It’s similar to feeling shock when you hear of others stealing, because you would never think to do that. You’re not consumed with the worry of people stealing from you, because you barely think about it.
Now, I’m not one for New Year’s resolution, but as a forever student I’m always looking to learn new ways that bring me closer to my truth. And I’m thinking this concept of not judging others in order to avoid feeling judged myself will place me on the right path.
And my truth knows this path will bring me genuine happiness – something that no object or other person could ever offer me.